QUESTION:

Somone is not interested in sex any more. What are some possible reasons?

ANSWER:

The following were suggested as possible answers or partial answers to this question:

- anxiety, tension, stress, pressure, worry.
- fear of failure.
- spectator role.
- bad experiences: sexual trauma, childhood sexual trauma, molestation, incest, sexual approaches.
- rape.
- fear of pregnancy.
- other life problems: job, family stress, etc.
- medications.
- physical illness: heart disease; diabetes; etc.
- alcohol.
- drugs.
- cigarettes. Nicotine?
- marijuana? Reduced sperm count? Breast enlargement?
- early training that sex is bad, dirty, disgusting.
- religious values.
- never been sexually satisfied. Or recently haven't been sexually satisfied.
- being pregnant.
- fear of pregnancy.
- giving birth. Post partum depression.
- being tired.
- not feeling sexy.
- discomfort with your body; poor self-image. (e.g. after gaining weight; giving birth; balding)
- sex is painful.
- hormonal changes (childbirth; period).
- deterioration of relationship. Not feeling loved. Not feeling in love. He doesn't love me. I don't love him any more.
- depression.
- lack of trust.
- angry at partner.
- nervous and uncomfortable in new relationship.
- inhibiting environment (parent's house; motel).
- having STD's.
- fear of getting STD's.

Key points:
- anxiety is central to many of these.
- things are complex.
- Many factors involved.
- NOT just sexual attraction / ability to respond sexually.