These comics were written by Nurendil, Jesús Martí Gómez and drawn by Jordi Bayarri, both from Spain. They originally appeared on ELFENOMENO.com, a Spanish website dedicated to LOTR and related stuff.

MOUNT DOOM

FRODO: It's the end of the One Ring, Gimli, it will melt once and for all! Gollum stole it from me and fell into the fiery depths!
GIMLI & FRODO: Clunk?
ORC: Well, yes, in summer Lord Sauron has us turn it off; we only keep it on between October and July, it's the new energy-saving plan...
GIMLI: What a beating the poor thing took on the way down!

LORD OF THE RINGS

BILBO: Aragorn, Gandalf! Guess who I met in the Prancing Pony? He really wants to meet you! None other than... The Lord of the Rings!
Yes, the great Michael Jordan, they call him that because the guy has six NBA championship rings, and... Hey, what's wrong? Why are you guys on the floor? And so pale? And... and why aren't you breathing?
ARWEN: The doctor says it's cardiopulmonary failure due to acute traumatic shock... and you just watch out when they wake up, Bilbo.

THE FELLOWSHIP HEADS SOUTH

ARAGORN: With all the gifts the Lady Galadriel offered us, Master Gimli had to choose 'one of those lovely elven boats shaped like a swan...' I could kill you!
LEGOLAS: 'Sailing is faster... sailing is faster...' And this is a feather!
GIMLI: How could I know the Anduin this time of year is drier than a troll's breast?
GANDALF: Less chitchat and quicken the pace... At this rate we'll arrive to find Orodruin extinguished already...

NAZGUL

NAZGUL 1: Yes, it's about this size, and inside is an inscription that says, 'Ash nazg durbatuluk...' No? Not here?
(SIGN ABOVE DOOR): Hobbiton Lost-And-Found
NAZGUL 1: Fine, fine, don't laugh, it wasn't such a bad idea... If the Ring were here, we'd have saved a lot of trouble... Besides, let's see if you think of something better before we go back empty-handed and Sauron turns us into orc-food...
NAZGUL 2 + 3: Bwa-ha-ha!
NAZGUL 1: Smart-asses!

BILBO'S 111-th BIRTHDAY

GANDALF: It definitely was not a good idea to store all the fireworks for Bilbo's birthday party in your house, Frodo...
FRODO: No. But I think the big mistake was hiding them in the chimney so he wouldn't find out... and not dousing the coals.
GANDALF: Correct.
FRODO: The question is, what do we do now?
GANDALF: First, find a cheap hotel so we don't have to camp out, right?

THE BATTLE OF THE PELENNOR FIELDS

SOLDIERS: For the Shire!
OBELIX: For Tutatis!
ASTERIX: For Belenos!
OTHERS: For Gondor!
ARAGORN: No, Gandalf, I know with these guys we'll win, I don't deny that, but I'm afraid the Tolkien purists will not like it at all... Not to mention what Christopher will say when he finds out...
ASTERIX (off): These orcs are crazy!

THE PALANTIR

GANDALF: Greetings, Bilbo, I hope you have cared for the Palantir well in my absence. Remember, I told you the slightest movement can desynchronize it and any small bump will make it useless for communication, and...
(FROM OFF): GOAL!!!!!
GANDALF: My... My Palantir! My Palantir!!!
(FROM OFF): Hey, Bilbo, stop chatting with the old man and come back in the game, they're killing us... And bring the ball, we get to kick off...

GANDALF THE WHITE

LEGOLAS: Look, I told him, Aragorn, I said: if you're tired of being Gandalf the Gray, be Gandalf the White, that's great, too... but no, he wanted to be Gandalf the Red, and of course, when Odo Proudfoot's prize bull saw him, dressed in red from head to toe, well...
GIMLI: Ho, well if he survives this, they'll call him Gandalf the Black-and-Blue; that thing was stomping on him for an hour!
(SIGN): Intensive Care Unit

SMEAGOL AND DEAGOL

ARAGORN: Frodo, are you telling me Gollum has gotten over his obsession with rings and hoops of every kind, and has gone in for weaponry?
FRODO: That's right, Aragorn.
ARAGORN: How strange...
FRODO: Yes, he keeps saying something about visiting a friend named Deagol, and muttering something about a birthday present...
ARAGORN: This Deagol must be a collector.
FRODO: Who knows?
GOLLUM: Deagol, my precioussss...

JRR TOLKIEN AND HIS WORK

GANDALF: I don't like the fireworks bit... The great wizard Gandalf shouldn't stoop to such things...
ARAGORN: What I think is there's too much romantic foolery... less billing and cooing with Arwen and more battles, that's what the son of Arathorn wants.
FRODO: What doesn't convince me is the ending. If this critter has to die anyway, why bite off my finger? I could just throw him in...
GIMLI: I think the readers would like a more emotional ending. I would add a chapter, I can see it now: "The Wedding of Gimli and Galadriel." Ah, it would be great! A real hit!
MRS. TOLKIEN: Come, come, John... don't cry, it's not so bad... It's your fault for consulting your own characters all the time... At this rate, the book will take a lifetime to write...

SPECIAL SUMMER EDITION OF "From Another Perspective": VACATION BY THE SEA BILBO: Well, friends, we're here... This is where we'll spend our summer vacation. LEGOLAS: Here?!? Are you sure, Bilbo? Look around, everything is burnt, dry... and there's no one on the beach. This is dead. BILBO: Well, according to the pamphlet the agency gave me... ARAGORN: Burnt? Dry? Dead? This doesn't sound right... I don't like it one bit. BILBO: But Aragorn, on the map in the pamphlet... ARAGORN: Dammit, I have a very bad feeling about this... Give me that pamphlet! Argh!! Sauron Tours! Barad-Dur Tourist Complex, stupendous beaches at the Sea of Nurnen... to Mordor! This ass brought us to Mordor! The orcs will eat us alive! But you, I'll kill first! BILBO: I was thinking it seemed very cheapghghgh...

GANDALF: Relax, Aragorn, fortunately I always have my Palantir with me... I'll tell the Men of Gondor and they'll rescue us quick. ARWEN: I hope we're in your calling area... GANDALF: That's it. They're on their way. We just have to hide from the orcs and wait for our rescuers. FRODO: Hide? Know what I say? Since we're here, we should enjoy the weather. I'm going swimming... anyone else? Legolas? Gimli? Gollum? GANDALF: But... the orcs... ARAGORN: I think young Frodo's right, Gandalf. We only get four days of vacation, let's not waste them. C'mon, Arwen. BILBO: Aragorn, get me out of here! Or at least put a hat on me, I'm roasting! ARAGORN: No way, you're staying there until they come for us, blockhead! FRODO: Say, while we're here, I could pop over to Orodruin and toss in the Ring. What do you think, Gandalf? GANDALF: What do I think? You're all loony, that's what I think. Leave me alone! The team at elfenomeno.com wishes you all a happy summer vacation... [and so does the translator!]

Click here for page 1 of "Desde otra perspectiva"/"From Another Perspective"

Click here for my LOTR humor index

volver a la página de la Dra. Small